GameCyte

Sigh.

From Mothers Against Drunk Driving, in a press release:

Each year nearly 13,500 people die in drunk driving crashes and another half a million are injured in alcohol-related traffic crashes. This is why MADD is extremely disappointed by the decision of the manufacturers of the game Grand Theft Auto IV to include a game module where players have to drive drunk. Drunk driving is not a game and it is not a joke. Drunk driving is a choice, a violent crime and it is also 100 percent preventable. MADD is calling on the Entertainment Software Ratings Board to reclassify Grand Theft Auto IV as an Adults Only game, a step up from the current rating of Mature and for the manufacturer to consider a stop in distribution – if not out of responsibility to society then out of respect for the millions of victims/survivors of drunk driving.

I know, I know, dignifying this with a response just gives it credibility. But, having finally sat down with Grand Theft Auto IV last night, I do actually feel this ought to be responded to.

Yes: Drunk Driving is an awful, awful crime. Two very close friends of my family were killed by drunk drivers, and it was one of the saddest days I can remember. I feel that people who commit drunk driving should be prosecuted to the full extent of the law, and then kicked in the groin until they can't stand up.

But I believe this is the case in real life. You know you get to shoot people in the head in this game, right, MADD? Was the "M" rating enough to cover that? I know it's your personal cause and everything, but if you're honestly saying that killing someone through gross irresponsibility is worse than purposeful, malicious, wholesale slaughter, I'm afraid you've lost me.

Also, if anything, GTA4 seems to agree with you on the "choice," "crime," and "preventable" parts. This is based on my limited experience with the game, but I went ahead and tried it out last night: Upon stumbling out of a bar, Niko's vision was extremely blurred, and the world wouldn't stay straight. I put him behind the wheel, and the cops were on me instantaneously. I hadn't even started driving, erratically or not -- the mere act of getting in the driver's seat was enough to trigger a crime. Navigating the car was near-impossible as I tried to flee; I caromed off of every vehicle on the road and plowed into a wall. This all happened, mind you, after the game suggested to me that drunk driving was probably a bad idea, and that I could very easily hail a cab with a single button press. It was a choice, it was a crime, and it was preventable.

I have the utmost respect for the victims of drunk drivers. We respect war survivors, too, but we still play Call of Duty.